This has been a long journey. Others that have come before me have paved the way and they have endured much, much more than I can bear. Learning from them, I know that I can’t continue my healing path the way it has been. It is time for a change, and change is a’comin’.
After a full year of treatment for Lyme Disease, I took some time to reflect on what this illness looks like in MY body, not anyone else’s. How it makes me feel on a day-to-day physical level. How certain treatments that I’ve tried have strained my spirit. Where I thought I would be at the first year mark is nowhere close to where I am right now. Whenever treatment isn’t going well, I find myself researching lesser known treatments. One in particular is my barometer for depression; when I keep picking up my book about that particular treatment, I know it’s time to check in with my doc and reassess my health status. Um, and put that book back on the shelf.
And then there were the bees.
Honey bees, that is. Not the Midwestern English use of “bees” to mean “nasty, horrible wasps” or “anything with wings on it that makes me shriek in fear.” I had been looking into the medicinal uses of honey bees, apitherapy, for a while now. A few weeks ago when I stopped myself and visualized this treatment, this 2 or 3 year commitment, this mode of self-treating Lyme Disease, well, I felt peace. I felt a gentleness wash over me that had not yet happened during any of my various treatments so far. This decision to pursue apitherapy as my main treatment is a huge decision that is not entered into lightly. And yet I feel none of that weight; rather, my soul is lifted. I don’t know how or why, but my soul is speaking and I am doing what it asks with the bees.